In week one: we had Gran Metalik v Alejandro Saez, Ho Ho Lun v Ariya Daivari, Cedric Alexander v Clement Petiot, and finally Kota Ibushi v Sean Maluta. For a first episode in something that we haven’t seen before in the WWE, it was quite decent. Gran Metalik Showed why he is so respected and Alejandro Saez showed great potential, even if it isn’t quite polished yet. Ho Ho Lun and Little Daivari had quite an underwhelming match, something that saddened me because I had been looking forward to seeing Baby Daivari. Cedric Alexander and Clement Petiot turned the show right back around, though. Petiot showed great heel work in defeat while Alexander showcased his talents very well. In the main event Kota Ibushi and Sean Maluta stole the show and showed me exactly what I had been hoping for: a real showcase of what the wrestling world, outside the WWE, has to offer.In week two: we had Tajiri v Damian Slater, TJ Perkins v Da Mack, Lince Dorado v Mustafa Ali, and Akira Tozawa v Kenneth Johnson. This is where things hit their stride for the Tournament. If you expected Tajiri to lose in the first round, then you’re probably rather unintelligent. He is WWE Alumni and is going to be treated as such. Once you get past the obvious outcome of his match, every match on the card delivers. Perkins and Da Mack were electric. Ali oozed cool in defeat to the smooth Dorado. Not to be out done, Tozawa and Johnson crushed expectations.
What is it about the Classic that has breathed new life into the WWE? Well it’s a number of things.
First, Wrestlers. In the WWE their wrestlers are called “Superstars”. This is a name that screams entertainment and tears away the clear athleticism, technicality and art. In the Classic, however, we are watching WRESTLERS. We are seeing true competition. We are seeing the future of NXT and the WWE. We are seeing technical wrestling at its finest. We are seeing the wonderful art of people who may not have wrestled each other and use different tongues speaking the same Language: The Art of Wrestling.
This leads to my next point, which is storylines. In the WWE you have Storylines and rivalries and scripts and everything that isn’t immediately important. I do believe that good storylines can enhance matches. For example, just look at CM Punk vs John Cena at Money in the Bank 2011. A great storyline only enhanced a great match in that case. However storylines can also make matches boring and a waste of time. Look at literally anything with the Golden Truth. No one cares and that leads to matches audiences won’t accept. We know Tyler Breeze is a good wrestler, yet when he gets put in a storyline that is about childish humor and whatever the hell the Golden Truth is, you get a really terrible outcome. Dolph Ziggler is probably the finest example of this. Everyone loves Dolph Ziggler, but has anyone been booked in worse storylines since their debut? We get it, you’re in a love triangle. Can you please just wrestle and oversell everything? I like that way better than seeing you try and seduce Baron Corbin. I know that wasn’t the actual storyline, but admit it, that probably would have been better than whatever they did for three months.
In the Classic the only storyline we see is the one that its competitors make in the ring. It’s a tournament bringing some of the greatest wrestlers from all around the world for crying out loud, that’s the only outside storyline you need. Watching people compete and try and best each other to finally be called champion is way better than hearing John Cena’s voice crack every week when he gets all passionate about something after he’s out of corny jokes.
This leads me to my final point about why The Cruiserweight Classic is so refreshing, the commentating team. If I was to list best things about the WWE to a friend who wasn’t into wrestling, but I was trying to convert, I would never talk about the commentating. Now, let’s pay some respects: JR was great, even more recently, Tom Phillips and Corey Graves have been killing it on NXT. That being said, Raw and Smackdown have the worst commentators, ever. Jerry “The King” Lawler was just perverted and not at all funny, JBL lost his allure when he started trying to joke every week to “Maggle” Cole. Byron Saxton is like the kid you invite to your birthday to not be mean but no one actually likes him, and Michael (or Maggle in JBLese) Cole is the worst thing to happen to commentating since Joe Buck. Now it’s true that after the WWE draft The Commentating teams for Raw and Smackdown have received facelifts. Raw now has Corey Graves, Byron Saxton and Michael “Oh Dear God You Don’t Stop” Cole. Smackdown, in return, will have Mauro Ranallo, JBL and David Otunga. Admittedly, I totally forgot David Otunga existed. In retrospect, I’m glad I did.
The Classic, however, has a much simpler commentating team of just Mauro Ranallo and Daniel Bryan. In my opinion, no commentating team, regardless of sport, needs more than two people. You can honestly even just stick with one, Vin Scully has proven that for decades. When you get up to three commentators, things get very convoluted. There’s just too much going on to maintain a coherent flow.
More importantly than the amount of people, though, is the style of commentating. On Raw and Smackdown, commentating is obviously scripted. The announcers hit every mark where they’re supposed to. They have very awful preplanned jokes that feel very forced, and they spend more time making awful jokes and laughing then watching the actual matches and commentating on the action. The commentators don’t have anyone who is a veteran who understands the current version of wrestling. Now you may be thinking, well they have Otunga, Graves, Saxton, JBL and Lawler. That’s true. Other than Graves, though, the rest are a waste. JBL wrestled during a different time and doesn’t translate to what goes on now, Lawler wrestled at a time comparable to basketball before the three point line, Saxton I don’t think ever got invited to a dance school, and David Otunga? During his tenure as a wrestler, he just kind moved around the ring for a bit and then got his ass beat. Like, seriously, how does that guy still have a job? On top of that none of these men was a true sports commentator before the WWE. Michael Cole was a journalist at one point, but he is about as professional at commentating as you would be at working, if you sent a d*** pic to your HR lady.
The Classic’s announce team is brilliant. First you have Mauro Ranallo, who is severely misused on Smackdown. On Smackdown he is scripted and even drops the occasional joke your dad would be embarrassed to tell. On the Cruiserweight Classic he is able to do what he did in New Japan and Pride Fighting Championships as the voice of the show, that is commentate on the action. This is unbelievable to hear, someone who is articulate and is telling you exactly what is happening in the ring with zero overemphasis, zero pop culture references and zero corny jokes. This is the Mauro Ranallo that everyone hoped we’d get when it was announced that he had signed. Opposite of him you have THE Daniel Bryan, one of the greatest wrestlers of all time, let alone his generation. Here is a man who wrestled in the current product, here is a man who wrestled all over the world like many of the indie stars we all love. Here is a man who knows; what move is where, how it’s being countered, what it’s being used for, and what effect it has on its recipient. What’s more impressive about this is how comfortable Bryan seems in the role. He was never a great promo guy as a wrestler, but as a commentator he is flying around more gracefully than he ever did in the ring. Now I’m sure some level of the commentating is scripted, it’s the WWE after all, but this feels fluid. This feels professional; this feels like I am watching a sporting event. This is what commentating is meant to be.
